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Pastors' Wives Retreat

Pastors' Wives Resource site provided by the Sunday School Discipleship Ministries International, a ministry of the Church of the Nazarene. We want to hear about your experiences, the lessons you’ve learned and how God’s Word and prayer supported and sustained you in the joys and challenges of parsonage life.

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Great is our Lord and mighty in power; His understanding has no limit. Ps 147:5

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We want to hear about your experiences, the lessons you’ve learned and how God’s Word and prayer supported and sustained you in the joys and challenges of parsonage life.

All submissions will be reviewed before they are posted.

Living In a Glass House PDF Print E-mail
Written by Barbara Roach   

Ministry hurts! What? “Yes, ministry hurts” is something someone once said to me and I am quite sure I heard it right. I have run that thought through my mind many times.  Ministry is not always easy, in fact as the wife of a pastor, most of the time we are right in the middle of many struggles that hurt. 

But, knowing what God brought me out of to where I am today, I feel very honored that He can use me… “a broken vessel”…alongside my husband, (the pastor), for His purpose.
Being involved in ministry puts you in the proverbial “glass house.”  Those in ministry are held to a high standard, but none of us can please everyone.  Shouldn’t the instruction of Colossians 3:5 be for everyone, clergy and laity alike?  Shouldn’t we all be spiritually minded? Looking back through the years, I see so many mistakes as a “pastor’s wife,” that I made trying to please everyone in the Church.  It is impossible to please everyone!  I have learned to look to Jesus, the Author and Finisher of the faith.  He is my strength and my only hope.  I know that if I strive to please God and not man, I will have struggles.  It is hard to always be “UP” when you are under attack, but there is a sweet peace in the midst of any storm when we focus on Jesus!  So many times we are approached right before the beginning of a worship service and it could be something concerning our husbands, children, or others in the Church.  I have learned to listen a bit, and then as best I can, let it slide off of me onto Jesus and enjoy the worship services.

It is hard when during the week you are called and someone says, “Can I talk to you?”  Glass House Stuff is coming…..You know as soon as you agree to this that somewhere within that conversation is going to be something negative.  We have to sit there and smile, take a deep breath, swallow and just let it go.  Forgiveness is a wonderful thing and sometimes it can just come from your heart without speaking a word.

A board member once asked my husband this, “How well do you take constructive criticism?”  My husband’s reply was this, “About as well as you do.”  The gentleman never said another word.

With all of this said, I want to encourage everyone to stay focused on Jesus.  We are in a glass house, but staying focused on the will of God enables us to persevere.  He is the one I listen to. He is the one I answer to. He is the one that counts. 

I have learned to look up and spend much time alone with God.  He can speak peace to us while we are just silent before Him.  He sees what is in the glass house and He knows our hearts.
One of my favorite Scriptures is: “Delight thyself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart.”  (Psalm 37:4 NKJV)  Whether it be a MEGA CHURCH or one of TWENTY…we are all in this ministry together.  When we follow this scripture, the “Glass House” can have a pretty view.


Barbara Roach is a professional recording artist, song writer, President/CEO of Jubilee Music Artists, and a pastor’s wife.

A note to Pastors' husbands –  

We welcome pastors’ husbands to visit this page and to provide insights into the needs and challenges you face. Let us know how we can minister to you and assist as you fulfill your supportive roles. Send your comments and suggestions to us at This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it . Until then, we welcome you to join the discussions and provide resources on this site...Read More

Prayer support –

Each weekday, Sunday School and Discipleship Ministries International (SDMI) meet for prayer. All requests will be presented to the staff, except those identified as confidential. We’ll pray for you, asking God to work and to extend grace and mercy...Read More

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